Medievia Mudslinger

November 19, 2000

The Night Before Double XP - By Gamileon

'Twas the night before double XP, and all through the lair,
not an adventurer survived, not even Elaxer.
Great Zek in his wisdom, poor me in my faith
(faith in my comrades whom Zek did mutilate)
Great Zek had just lain down for a 100 year nap,
not to awake, save for some unfortunate mishap.

When outside his lair, there was such a clatter. . .
200 heros did talk and did chatter.
The heros put on their equipment with care,
in hopes that the breath would not find them bare.

"Let us get ready. . . ." One hero said,
while visions of dragon hide danced in his head.
When what to their jittery eyes did appear,
but a pink elephant; Vryce at his posterior.

More rapid than an eagle, his elephant came,
and so he shouted, and called heros by name:
"Now, Curer! Now, Landier! Now, Callanter and Ojom!
On, Ratnex! On, Daedric! On, Elewyn and Jostun!
To the middle of the zone!
To the middle of the lair!
Now get along! Get along! Get along there!"

So, to the top of the lair Vryce's elephant flew,
With a bag full of Dragon Crystals - and other
treasures, too.

And then, in a twinkling, Zek heard on the route
The prancing and pawing of each little boot.

As I walked inside and was turning around,
Zek blew his first breath, and OH, what a sound!
Dressed in saving breath from my head to my foot.
My equipment was quickly covered in soot.

A bundle of hide Zek had on his back,
and looked as if fear was the only thing he did lack.

A blink of his eye and a twist of his head
Soon gave me to know that we all were dead.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
killing us all, with barely a jerk.

At end, he laid his claw next to his nose,
but after the carnage, he still arose.
We had done but a scratch, all 200 of us. . .
Now in our blood, we did wish and did fuss.

Well, Vryce, seeing what damage was done,
sprang to his mount. . . The End of the fun.
My corpse heard him shout, as he flew out of sight:
"Merry Double XP, and to all a good fright!"

The above poem is based on Twas the Night Before Christmas By Clement Clarke Moore.