Medievia Mudslinger

November 15th, 2003

Ten Days by Kranda

How to Lose a Med Guy in Ten Days

Day 1: At the wedding, ask all the groom's clannies if they have ever seen him AFK in a rent-a-fantasy room.

Day 2: Beg him to enroll your newbie in his clan and complain because no one ever xps there.

Day 3: Beg him to xp your newbie when you log on, but log off in a huff when he tells you he's running Bloodstone with the "guys" and can't come over right now.

Day 4: Ask him why whatshername got two fire diamond rings when she married his bloodline brother, but you only got one.

Day 5: Whine because he refuses to sing your favorite song seven times in a row on the song channel in medlink.

Day 6: Always be broke. Of course, this requires that you bank all your cash. You must appear broke at every opportunity.

Day 7: Sulk in your gohall for fifteen minutes without speaking to him because he beat your father in a cpk duel and looted his favorite max piece of eq.

Day 8: Use lots of silly socials today. Make up annoying emotes. Bounce and giggle a lot. He *will* grow tired of it.

Day 9: Send him bloody meat (purchased in Trellor) as a gift, and let him ponder your intentions.

Day 10: Pitch a fit in the middle of the lair you're both on, and ask him why exactly he is ignoring you. Get him mob killed a couple of times and finally teleport out in a huff.


How to lose a Med Chick in ten days:

Day 1: 'Accidently' mischannel "oh baby ... right there" to imm ten minutes after the wedding.

Day 2: Sing "Hit me baby one more time" on song channel when she requests that you sing a song for her.

Day 3: CPK duel her father, and take the one piece of eq you know he doesn't want to lose.

Day 4: Send her withered black roses (Sceptrum) instead of the more romantic dozen red roses.

Day 5: Ask her to please take your newbie combing, but fail to mention that he's a single cleric with no stats who can't loot eggs because you also use him for storage.

Day 6: Use her as CPK bait while she's trading through Dark Woods, but don't tell her in advance.

Day 7: Yell at her for phasing you to 'snuzzle' when you're staking Fire Giant's Keep.

Day 8: Telepath her and ask what she's wearing under her armor while still mindlinked just after finishing a herobattle.

Day 9: Send her bloody meat (purchased in Trellor) as a gift, and let her ponder your intentions.

Day 10: Send her a cattle prod and a well-chewed dog bone for her birthday. (These items can be found in Trellor and Rydhordel)

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