December 23rd, 2001
Medievian Courses for Avatars - By Morac
(The ones they don't tell you about when you apply...)
The courses listed below are to help new avatars and refresh old ones
in the different ways to help newbies. The courses run for a duration
of three weeks of part time study or field work.
Each course is taught on a one to one basis by a god and requires a one
thousand word essay (entitled "Why I want to help newbies, am I sane?")
to be handed in at the end. A large part of the course is built around
practical work (bringing newbies back to life and advising real
newbies, not the tame kind) and there is some minor course reading involved.
Young Corpses, New Life.
This book details the appropriate way to phase in to help a recently
deceased newbie. It starts with a section about checking the weather
first so you don't die by the same tornado that killed the newbie, and
contains advice so that you don't phase into the group of ten troll
captains on the newbie's trade run. There are also a number of useful, but
often ignored, pieces of advice, such as the correct way to hold your gem of
Idiot's Guide to Spotting Newbies.
A must have for new avatars, with details of what makes someone a
genuine newbie. This guide details the various tell-tale signs of what makes
a newbie a fake newbie. Can you spot a CPK setup? Has a newbie called
you by your real life name? Has a newbie commented about how it was
back in the good old days of Med 3? We show you all these hints and more!
The Official "How to Help a Newbie" Quick Reference Guide.
This worthy tome contains all the key information on how to help a
newbie. Confused by questions about the Refuge? Open this book at the
center for a pop-up walkthrough. Golden Ring and Flasks of Holy Water -
essential gear and every tweak and repop detail is mentioned in here.
Potions for lower levels? You want them, we can show you where to get them.
101 Uses for a Newbie
This libram, bound in tanned Baenlyr hide, has a list of all the
different things you can do with a newbie, from experiencing them to saving
their lives in player killing zones. That's right, you too can take the
backstab aimed at your junior friends. Guess what - this book will
tell you how.
Courses for the New Avatar -
-How to not Mischannel to Immortal or Clan.
Many new avatars accidentally confuse the "av *message*" channel for
the "imm *message*" channel. Want to avoid explaining how to get a
Tarnished Copper Belt from the Graveyard to your Hero chums? Do your
clannies need to know where the Golems are in their caverns? This course
teaches simple techniques to avoid these problems.
-What the NPK in Fire Giants Keep is for, and what to do with those flutes.
Want to know what is down that hidden NPK passage in Firegiant's Keep?
Not sure if you can force yourself not to enter CPK? This course will
teach you all there is to know about satyrs and their funny little
flutes. We even include a special pull out with ten of your favorite tunes
scored for the Satyr flute in D minor.
-Why not to carry the Book of the Avatar into CPK.
Most people don't realize that the Book of the Avatar makes you a
target in CPK. It's hard to believe with all the other items, such as max
tweak flutes, Platinum Wands, Clear Jars and Golden Rings, but some
people still want to loot the book. This course will tell you just why
people covet the Book of the Avatar so much and how to avoid people looting
-Where to find newbies.
Not sure where to find those elusive newbies? Looked at all the main
zones such as Demonforge or Elysium and still cant find any? Fear not as
we will show you how to get to those nearly unheard of zones called
Shadowclaw and Goblin Castle. These dangerous and wily areas are only for
the truly cunning, but we'll show you the pitfalls and death traps you
need to know about to survive.
-Ten ways to make the AVATAR flag nice and shiny.
Is your Avatar flag losing its sheen? Dust, dirt, and the general wear
and tear of combat taking its toll? Fear not, for with this course you
too can have that piece of text at it's pristine best once again.
Forget the brand name cleaning lotions, we can teach you the three best
varieties of Baenlyr oil and how to press it for yourself.
Courses for the More Experienced Avatar
-How to manage three newbies on telepath, newbie clan channel and pray
all at once.
Complementing the mischannel course above, with this course you can
learn to manipulate your telepathy along with pray responses, newbie clan
talk, avatar talk, immortal channel chat and your client chat program.
Sounds complicated? Indeed it is, but after mastering this course you
will be at one with the universe and know what the sound of one hand
clapping is like.
-How to make friends and influence newbies so they don't PK you when
Many people don't realize that befriending a newbie today might help you in
PK tomorrow. We show you seventeen fail-safe methods of ensuring that
those who you help will remember it, especially when you're being
stalked by them in the more dangerous areas of Medievia. Not a course for
-How to make [AVATAR] into [CHAMPION AVATAR] and more
Is the Avatar flag not enough for your active lifestyle? Do you yearn
for a title that would spam other players off the screen every time
they walk into your room? Follow the advice in this course and you too
could be known as "[LEGEND] [CHAMPION AVATAR] [DH] Prince (Yourname)
(clan title) is here [IT]".
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